Snackbox Diaries would now like to make a small presentation on behalf of a new surefire money-making scheme that's got the country talking!
Yes yes yes, it's magical beans! On with the show.
MAGICAL BEANS
Magical = Out of the Ordinary
- Running successfully in Bulgaria for 8 years
IDEA BEHIND THE MAGICAL BEANS SYSTEM
- Gold and lots of it
REASONS TO BUY MAGICAL BEANS
- Normal beanstalk takes 4-6 months to grow
- Magical beanstalk grows overnight
- Normal beanstalk crumples under the weight of a 4-year-old
- Magical beanstalk takes the weight of an average countryman - even one with mucky wellingtons and an erection
- Normal beanstalk does not have a giant and lots of gold on top
- Magical beanstalk...does
MAGICAL BEANS ARE
- Not Bachelors Beans
- Not Brendan-, Has- Or Oiled-up Les-Beans
- Not likely to induce wind
MAGICAL BEANS ARE GROWTH INTENSIVE
AND TOTALLY LEGAL
NORMAL BEANS WORK LIKE THIS:
MAGICAL BEANS WORK LIKE THIS
BEFORE YOU BUY MAGICAL BEANS, YOU SHOULD:
- Make sure you have a cow to sell
- Make sure your wife won't clonk you over the head with the frying pan when you get home
- Make sure you realise there may be an ANGRY CANNIBALISTIC GIANT WAITING AT THE TOP OF THE BEANSTALK
- It's your OWN PROBLEM if you get your bones ground down to make his bread
Comments (2)
hehe. brilliant. unfortunatley you could could probably sell the concept in Cork for real
Posted by ro_G | March 19, 2006 11:05 PM
Posted on March 19, 2006 23:05
Our love is rice and beans and horses!
Posted by Dave | March 20, 2006 8:11 AM
Posted on March 20, 2006 08:11