Curry Chips

Gregorio. He loco? No man, he just throw the best rooftop parties in all of Havana!

Or at least he did until that day he wanted something...a little different.

That was when it all went a little pear-shaped, man.

With their new album "The Lovely Bum" already platinum in several Scandinavian countries, the unstoppable colossus of aural fudge that is WESTLIFE seems likely to dominate the Irish charts again this Christmas.

Nat King Coleslaw managed to catch up with them as they ran away from him through the streets of Sligo, and got some interesting insights before their minders put him in hospital.

For years, most Paddies wandered about the place completely oblivious to the fact that they all slotted into neat little categories.

Breakfast Roll Noel, DIY Bri, Ready Meal Neil...little did they know that they all behaved in utterly predictable patterns.

That was all about to change, thanks the advent of...the Messiah.

Lo, did he descend from Mount Merrion with the good news. The news that we were all...the Pope's children.

Irish urban-rural relations were said to be "at an all-time low" following a "deeply ruralist" profanity-laden performance by Michael Richards during a stand-up act in Dublin.

The incident, captured in digital-camera video footage obtained by the rural website TheMulchieZone.com and circulated over the internet on Monday, took place during Richards' live performance on Thursday night at the Bleeding Horse pub on Camden Street.

Ah sure lookit.

There's Padraig (pronounced "PAW RICK" by foreign sports commentators) Harrington, and he accepting an honorary velvet head-poof from an Irish university that obviously has too much time on its hands. And there's the missus, all cock-a-hoop and beaming it up.

To the paintshop, good friends!

Link to inferior remake

Link to spookily similar movie