Curry Chips

Snackbox diaries would now like to take time out from stocking up on assorted LIDL/ALDI low-cal shakes and gym equipment to congratulate Ana Leddy on finishing her first year as the head of RTE Radio 1.

You see, Ana knows that the best medicine for a sickly child is a good hearty shoe in the hole. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! And Radio 1 needed a shoe in the hole to get back into serious competition with Today FM, Newstalk 106 and the plethora of regional stations with their fantastic court reports and greyhound pup ads.

So in came the Leddy shoe! Unfortunately, it had Derek Mooney and Mary Wilson stuck to it. And it hit the respective rumps of John Creedon, Myles Dungan, John Kelly and Rachel English.

Out went Dungan and Kelly with their arty-farty broadcasts. Out went Creedon with his "eclectic" music taste and "five-minute philosophy" segments.

On the plump side after the festive feastiness?

Too lazy to unglue your arse from the sofa and walk the spare tyre off?

Then sweat no more! Just pick from one of these fantastic diet plans!

Having debunked the myth of the elitist snot-nosed Gaeilgeoir in "No Béarla" by wandering around Ireland making normal people look foolish, the erudite and fabulous Manchán Magan now tries his hand with the French.

"No Fraincís" sees Manchán trying to make his way around Normandy, relying solely on his wits and his Gaeilge.

Hilarity is bound to ensue! Let's join Manchán as he contemplates the port town of Cherbourg.

Trevor Brennan's decision to engage in a bit of audience participation during last weekend's Ulster v Toulouse rugby game delighted many, but left thousands of internet users frustrated at the lack of video goodness.

Fret no more for here it is! And it's juicier than you would have thought.

More: Toulouse v Ulster photos

Good on you, Tony Killeen. Sure couldn't it happen to a bishop.



More: I wrote what now?

Snackbox Diaries is delighted to present a WORLD EXCLUSIVE: A rare insight into the life of a modern day crimefighter.

A crimefighter by the name of Paul Williams.

Who keeps an eye on the bad guys? He does, stupid.

KEY EXTRACT FROM PAUL'S DIARY, DATED MONDAY, JANUARY 22

It's 7am. Normal people can sleep on, I can't. I open my eyes, say "Let's do some good" and swing my feet out of bed. Immediately I step on an upturned plug. I hop around a bit, swearing and making "hoo-haa" noises. That's when I spot my spouse, my LIFE PARTNER doing a pretty poor job at stifling her giggles. So I grab up the plug and give her an emotional "THESE BASTARD PLUGS WON'T STOP ME FROM DOIN' MY JOB" speech. Catty bitch goes into the bathroom before I can finish. Another day in your ivory tower, baby. If only you could spend a day in my shoes.

I head out to the bus stop. People raise their eyes when they see me coming. People who don't have to worry about reaching into their pocket for their mobile phone and finding a stick of fucking dynamite. The bus pulls into the stop. I tell the driver who I am, and together we conduct a thorough sweep of the vehicle. It's clean.